The Art of Being Intentional: What is Intentional Living?
We all want to live full lives. We want to be present with those who we love most. We want to experience joy and gratitude. We want to bring good to the world, inspire others in meaningful ways, and live in accordance with our values.
But sometimes our best intentions are at odds with our reality. We are busy. We are tired. We are stretched thin. We are trying to do it all and be it all, and, in the process, our life speeds by. Then, looking back at our lives, we realize that we missed parts of them. In our rush, hurry, and haste, we forget to practice the art of intentional living.
Being intentional helps us recognize what kind of life we want to live and gives us the tools to create that life.
What characterizes intentional living:
Actions guided by conscious thought
At the forefront of creating an intentional life is purposeful action. Rather than simply floating through life or operating on autopilot, intentional living is driven by intention.
So much of our days we move through without awareness. Harvard researchers found that we spend approximately half of our day thinking about something other than what we are presently doing.
Princeton professor and Nobel prize winner, Daniel Kahneman describes two Systems of thinking in his book Thinking, Fast and Slow. The first, System 1 is automatic. It operates quickly, is unconscious, and is prone to bias.
System 2 is slower and requires more conscious and effortful thought. It is more reliable, yet it requires more energy and attention. Because System 1 is easier, we rely on it most of the time. Intentional living invites us to tap into our System 2 thought process more frequently.
I emphasize “actions” because intentional living does not require us to control our thoughts or feelings. Meditation can aid us in being less controlled by our thoughts and feelings, but we can allow our thoughts and feelings to move as they like. The goal of an intentional life is simply to make sure that our resulting actions are purposeful.
Knowledge of your values and priorities
An intention-filled life is one that is in alignment with our values and priorities. In order to live in accord with our beliefs, we must first know what we believe. What matters to you?
Journaling is one of the best ways to examine your beliefs and see what parts of your life are congruent with your values.
Explore these prompts:
What do I prioritize?
Why are those my priorities?
Are my choices and actions aligned with my priorities?
What are my values?
Are the things I am prioritizing consistent with my values?
What am I prioritizing with my actions that doesn’t align with my values?
How can I shift my life to better align my priorities with my values?
“An intention-filled life is one that is in alignment with our values and priorities.”
A life that is honest and true to you
Carl Jung once said, “the privilege of a lifetime is to become who you truly are.” Intentional living propels us into our most authentic lives. When we practice being intentional, we learn more about who we are, what we value, and how we want to live.
My son often asks me “why” questions that inspire me to think critically in a way that I wouldn’t have without his inspiration. As adults, many of us cease questioning and instead use our System 1 brains to make decisions for us. Often we act, feel, and think a certain way because that’s what we were taught as children, because it’s what we’ve always done, or because we emulate the behaviors we see modeled around us. When we stop to ask ourselves “why” we are acting a certain way our lives become more harmonic.
Before acting, ask yourself the following questions:
Why am I making this decision?
Is this choice authentic to me?
Does this option feel aligned with who I am and who I want to be?
"When we practice being intentional, we learn more about who we are, what we value, and how we want to live.”
When we force ourselves to stop and examine our decision making, our priorities, and our values we are living with intention. As we continue to ask ourselves how we want to live and if our actions are aligned with the life we want and the people we want to be, we nudge ourselves towards a more intentional life.
Share what you find most appealing about living an intentional life.
